The Raymundo Show

Follow The Leader

September 19, 2022 Ray Gonzalez Season 4 Episode 36
The Raymundo Show
Follow The Leader
Show Notes Transcript

The phrase follow the leader is real when it comes to our next guest. In this episode we talk about leadership and women in leadership roles so we had to get speaker, author, doctor, Dr. Marisol Capellion. Tune in now to hear all about the importance of leadership roles and whose in them.

Special Guest: Dr. Marisol Capellan

IG: @profcapellan

YouTube:
https://youtu.be/xodmYNc-5lc

https://www.linkedin.com/in/marisolcapellan/



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Yeah. Is your host Raimundo. Welcome to my show. Where we relate. Have fun. Talk about real shit. And just find ways to be better. Overall. Like my two K uh, Like my two key attributes. Two K 23 is out right now. But this is episode 36. Followed the leader. And of course it's about leadership. We all have a. There's a way for all of us. To find the leader within. And take charge of our lives. Well, yeah, it was his, I ain't fully then, you know how I do things here on the show. Yeah, I guess somebody who's an expert or living that life every day. but before we get into that, I split the habit. I just know. Let's go Let's go let's go. So this quote of the day comes from. Peter Drucker. Leadership is uplifting a person's vision. It's a high sites. The raising of a person's performance to a highest standard. The building of a personality beyond his normal limitations. And I think it's dope, man. Cause we all been around those. People would add. Got that leadership in them. And. or that mentor. spirit. And they tell you things that. Get you more excited. Then the shit you tell yourself. And it's not too many people got that ability. I would like to think that I do. I'm always speaking positivity and I'm always. Trying to make sure people don't go through the same mistakes Uh, I also do a hill on the podcast. I've learned from some of them, some of them I'm still working on, but. I'm a work in progress. and we all. Yeah, and I won't lie in certain. Parts of my life, where I needed to step up. Sometimes. The person that was like, you know, above me. Would give me. Like almost like a little boost of confidence, like they'll, let me see what I didn't see. And how, and pretty much helped me. Because. Yeah. Cause you know what happens when someone sees what you don't see, then you kind of like. You got to take a step back. And. I'd be like, yo, why? I don't feel like that about me. You know what I'm saying? Certain people that I've worked with that come to mind. I used to work with this dude named when I was in the leasing game and I wasn't doing too good until we came in. And just like, took it upon themselves to. Put me in the right direction. So I could start sudden and you'll start making some money so I can. I was living in Miami. I mean, I was, I wasn't. Yeah, I was getting money, but I wasn't getting money. sat down and talked to me, I was on some whole other shit. sharing the real estate game. Jonathan thous, man, he was the office manager. Yo he was, I don't know. He was a good salesman. Uh, so I don't know if he was really keeping it a bulk with me, but he, he made me feel like. I could really be the best real estate agent. Like he would tell me like, yo, your personality, everybody loves you. Yeah, you'd be fucking He always kept at a But yeah, you always, you be fucking up, but, you know how to do it. There's times that I will leave the office and I will come back and sell right away and he would just sit me in the office. Like why you playing with your life? Why are you playing with your career, man? Like. I remember one time. Uh, I was going through some. You know, as my real estate career was crumbling. Towards the end. He sat me down and told me like, yo. Yo you could be the office manager, like at some point. You could do so good that you can take my spot, like, and he had a really. Top position like. I mean, I don't know. I don't know. his bosses would have felt about that. But. you know, I believe the way he told me and it just, it made me motivated, Did it last? No, but. I feel like real leaders. Really make you feel like that, like they make you really realize your potential on how. Good. You could really be Yo. So. The title comes from. When I used to work in Lakota on blue. He used to be always Caribbean parties, man. And. The there's certain songs that just set on my head, like just will always be with me and I'm going to do. I'm going to name three right now is I'm Bison Tencent. and, um, like the families would get on the line and they will just follow the leader. what time they let me get on the lot. I almost got fired. and this is you. I heard this song like three years before it came out into like radio, but let me And you, we call it. Yeah. Uh, oh man, those were y'all. When you were young. You work at seven hours getting $31. So you had to work like eight shifts to get a Besame. Cause what. It was great. I met a lot of great people, man. Shout out the scaly feet though. Uh, fuck. I don't want to miss anybody. She. Louis Javier. But yeah let's get into it.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

so here on the Raymundo. wanted to, you know, talk about leadership, also women in leadership. Uh, and I got a special guest that embodies that she's, um, internationally recognized. She's an award winning educator, speaker She does it all, especially when it comes to the leadership field, she's a voice and I thought it would be great to have her voice on the Rayo show to give us those great gems and stories that, uh, help someone listening right now. my ladies and gentlemen, I wonder what, give a warm welcome to Ma Dr. Marial Capon

Track 2:

yes. Thank you so much for having me here. it's a pleasure. I mean, we've been having this conversation before. You introduced me and I'm already having you fun here.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah, definitely.

Track 2:

So yes, I used to be a university, uh, faculty, uh, used to teach at the university of Miami, used to teach management and leadership. I'm from the Dr. Afro Latina immigrant.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Santa

Track 2:

So, so.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

what part actually.

Track 2:

Well, another camp Santiago, but you know how people say, oh

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Oh, Sango.

Track 2:

yeah, but you know what? Loving my village. I grew up there and grew up in Ava. So I know the struggle a lot. My family's still back there and I came to the us when I was 16. And then, you know, you're here without a family without anybody. At 17, I became homeless and I was, I went through a lot, uh, when I came to the us. So you're seeing like a 17 year old girl sleeping in a mattress for two years in a stranger's home and living in different houses. And I was like, you know what? I have to get my degree because I need to get out of this situation. I was like, I was the first one from my family to come to United States and get an education in an

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Uh, that's awesome. That's awesome.

Track 2:

I powered through that. And I graduated with honors with my bachelor's degree and then went for my master's graduated with a master's in leadership, uh, with honors. And then I also became the first one in my whole family with a doctoral degree. So that's why, when people introduced me, I'm like, you gotta say doctor, because he took me to go here to go here.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

I'm gonna edit that just because I was, um, I, I always like to ask the name cause I always wanna pronounce it. Right.

Track 2:

It's okay.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

but trust, wanna a doctor too. And I can't, I wanna change my, my show in the future to the,

Track 2:

Oh, well I love it. Well, I, I would say you will be a doctor. So the first thing start with that, the way that we say things. So

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

You know what? That's crazy. I like reading these mind books is like, you have to change the

Track 2:

you have to say it.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Cause it changes reaction. Right? So if I, if I talk like I already have it or it's gonna happen, I'm gonna move accordingly instead of,

Track 2:

so talking about the mindset, if you don't mind me, you know, company with this, um, something that really changed my life because you know, you're going through homelessness. and you are struggling and you're just like, want to give up, like, there were many times that I went back to the Dr. And I was like, I'm not going back. I'm not going back to the us. Like, it's terrible. In terms of like, I was going through, I was working McDonald's I was cleaning houses. I had nowhere to stay. Like, it was just so hard. And one of the mindset techniques that I think is so powerful is that you have to not only, you know, talk as if you already have it, but you also have to, make it part of your identity. So, for example, there's some people that say, well, I want to be a writer. I was like, no, you have to say that you're a writer. Like you have to say, I'm a writer. And then when you say I'm a writer, then you're going to look for behaviors that match that identity.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah. Wow. A small shift like that. Makes a big difference,

Track 2:

Yes. When I was writing my book, like right now I'm writing a book called leadership is a responsibility. And one of the exercises that I come in this community where we like write the book together and everything. One of the exercises that they had us do was that we had to put in our LinkedIn profile in our Instagram and everything. One of the three identities that we have is author. And everybody was like, well, how am I gonna call myself an author? If the book is not published? And they say, no, you can't wait for the book to be published in order for, to, for you to call yourself an author, you are writing the book right now. So you are an author because you're writing. So that small shift of putting in my LinkedIn profile, I'm an author. Like all of a sudden, like, I feel like I'm part of this community of people, right? And I'm part of the community of people are published and the behavior just changes the interaction changes. So if you are dreaming or if you are wanting to be some something in the future, you have to adopt it as part of your identity.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah, like, like if you wanna manage a job, you don't wait till you become the manager to get the job. You be the, you act like the manager before you get the position. Um,

Track 2:

you have to exert influence you have, you have to lead from where you are.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Leave from where you are. Yeah, I like that. So, where, where do you currently live now?

Track 2:

I'm in Miami.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Miami? Um, we have another connection. I, my father's been living in Miami since I was.

Track 2:

Really

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

yeah, and I lived from, in Miami for two years, two, three years. So, you know, the, the, the Kato in the, the, uh, what's those things called with the

Track 2:

bodega a street.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

no, no. It's oh my God.

Track 2:

Yes. Yeah. And I go to the Dominican neighborhood all the time. So.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

yeah, my, my, I have, I have family in the, in the Dominican neighborhood. what part do you stay in?

Track 2:

no, I'm now closer to south Miami in coral Gables,

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Oh, you're Gables.

Track 2:

yeah, well, close to coral Gables. Yeah. I used to work in coral Gables. University of Miami was in, in coral Gables,

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

it isn't coral Gables

Track 2:

but, um, I used to live in a.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

a oh, I see. That's where the do is, is at right. Oh, that's that's where we go to, we used to go there, I think to get the truck, you know, you know, the truck, the Jimmy truck. Cause they had like chimi trucks over.

Track 2:

Yeah,

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah around there. Huh?

Track 2:

I'm from, I know the hood.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

well, my, my father, Oh, no, that, oh yeah. I, I lived, I lived in Kendall for a while. Uh, it was a great experience, especially coming. I'm from Brooklyn.

Track 2:

Mm-hmm

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

to Miami and it was getting better in Brooklyn, but it still wasn't like how it is now. And then I moved to Kendall and it was, it was a great experience. I can't lie the weather. um, just everything, the food, the people I was, I, my Spanish got better. Like, I'm not, I'm not a great Spanish speaker,

Track 2:

Mm.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

my Spanish, I was talking Spanish on a regular. I felt so good to finally be able to talk so much Spanish and it was, you know, it was okay. And, I want that, that leads me to a question. you got your master's and your doc doctoral over there in the most distracting place and be a bachelor's every like. And the most distracting place in the world. How was that experience for you?

Track 2:

the distraction plays in the work, the world, because Miami is just so vibrant. Right. So I, I remember I was the thing about me is that when I was in Miami, I was 17. And I think I, I, I shared already that I was homeless at one point, right? Yeah. You don't have the luxury to not, to, to be distracted. Yeah. Yeah. So I feel like, you know, some people like talk about, I know that Miami is very, like, it can get very distracting, but you know, I, when you know that you have to go somewhere and you're very focused on it, you know, you kind of deal with the distraction a little bit better because what are you gonna do? Like if I, if I had the luxury of being distracted, I wouldn't finish my degrees. Like I had, I couldn't, I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it because that was my way out of poverty. At least in my mind, I

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

came from a very, and that's, that's a strong reason to, to be able to block everything out and, and go forward,

Track 2:

like exactly. So I feel like I grew up faster. that I should have mm-hmm because I was 17 and 18, but I was already thinking like ahead of my days ahead of my years. Yeah. Yeah. Um, because by the time I finished my bachelor's, I had gone through so much that I couldn't relate a lot with people my age, when I was speak to them, I could relate with people that were older and I ended up marrying somebody who was older than me, because I just could, like, I remember. You know, talking to people that were my age of talking to people that were 20, 21, and they were complaining about this and about that. And I was like, I had no time for it. Like

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

you can't, it's be like, oh, you whichever am whichever Miah

Track 2:

you have to put on like your big person pants and go do it. Like that's was my mindset because, you know, if I didn't work, I wasn't going to be able to eat.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah. You, you want to eat, you gotta. You gotta work, work on something.

Track 2:

Yeah. So, you know, we don't talk about this a lot, but you know, a lot of these things, I'm not saying that if you're rich and if you have a lot of things available to you, you don't go through hard times. Of course, you know, try to this happen to a lot of people. Um, you can, you know, have met people that. I've met people that, you know, lose a family member, people that go through a lot, go through a lot of struggle. And sometimes they have a lot of money, a lot of things available to them, but there is certain things that happen to you when you come from a very poor background that you can just, you can't, you can't stop. You just have to keep going, because if you stop going, you lose everyth. So I don't have the luxury of like, oh, let me just sit here and get distracted. Or let me sit here and, and, you know, wait for this to pass. I'm like, wait for this to pass means I'm not eating for a whole week. Yeah.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

And I don't know, like, things like that, they make your character stronger. Uh, they do it matures you a lot. Uh, um, I'm sorry, you had to go through that. Um, I know someone that went through something similar. And they're super strong. So is, is that what led you to getting into the leadership field? Like, like being going through that, you're like, you know what, I'm gonna take the lead and I'm gonna make sure nobody else goes through this. I'm gonna make sure help people find their, you know, their boss potential So

Track 2:

that was the funny story, how I ended up in business. So first when I was in the Dr in the Dominican Republic, my, uh, you see my family there had like a business, a small. Very small business. And I was like this person who used to lead the office and I'm like 13, 14 years old. Uh, I had always had an affinity for business, always, always, always, but I was always afraid to embark in a business because that business ended up being bankrupt at the end when I left. Wait, Then I decided because I've always been like a teacher I've always liked to be. I, I was always a tutor. I was always like this person who will buy a board and just teach people. I used to be a tutor for college students while I was going to college. That was how I used to make money on the side. That's so I would be like, I'll prepare you for any test. Math everything. I just love to study. I graduated with honor. So

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

I would, would you

Track 2:

particular I'm like, this is my work, but, um, what happened was that I wanted to become a Therma mathematician. First. I wanted to learn, uh, teach. and I like numbers and I just love to study. So when I went through that, I did my associates in math. And then in order for me to get my bachelor's in math, I had to take calculus.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

OHK body

Track 2:

The calculus was tough. I mean, when you, when I was taking calculus, you had to dedicate like extra, extra, extra amount of hours in calculus. And I was like, I need to go to work. I can't just like sit and like, try to understand these concepts. I get four or five hours. I can't do this. So. I tried to do it. I, I, I wasn't, I couldn't like just, I, I just decided, you know, what, I've always loved business. So I went and did my bachelor's in supervision and management. That was another thing that I was passionate about. And then I went to get my MBA. I tried to get an MBA, um, as part of my, um, When, when I went to get my MBA, I was working at the university of Miami as a staff mm-hmm And part of their programs for staff is that you could go and get your master's degree. And when you get your master's degree, you pay like. An amount for the master, not the whole masters mm-hmm Uh, but then I noticed that I couldn't do my MBA. So they was like, what can I do? So they, because supposedly they wouldn't do the, the, that program for the MBA program. There were some programs that were restricted and they were talk, they talked about leadership. So I looked at the program and I said to myself, well, I've always loved leadership. I was always leading my classroom. I was always leading a dance group, a tutor group. I was always leading. I always liked to lead. Did you sit

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

in the. Did you always sit in the front? I

Track 2:

always sat in the front.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

You see, that's an example. They always say the person that sits in the front is serious.

Track 2:

So I was, oh, I always sat in the front. I always showed up early. I was the last one to leave the class. I was always asking questions to the professor. I was always like, you know, on top of my game, when he came to my class. So I said, you know, I've always loved leadership. So let me do this. So I went into leadership with such. Love for leadership because I always admire these people that, you know, became leaders in society. Like I used to look back in, you know, Al um, from our, from the Dr. So the three sisters, the Ibel sisters in the Dr, that they were able to, you know, lead a whole re revolution, like from where they were. And I always looked at millennial Mandela and. All of these people that just became leaders. I used to look up to these people and say, look, you have to have this courage and this grit and this power to make this happen. Mm-hmm so really like the, the field, I went into the field just wanting to learn how to be a better leader. And then once, while I was doing my master's degree and I was going forward in my career, I noticed that, you know, we have a crisis in leader. The people that are leading institutions that are leading in society. And I'm not gonna say like a hundred percent of them, but a lot of them are there for the wrong reasons. Yeah. They're there for their own self interest. They're there because of status they're there because they love to tell other people that they're leaders at X, Y, Z organization, or because they're the president of X, Y, Z, like. Country corporation government. And that, that gets them into certain circles and that's for them. And I feel like we're, we're missing the people that are leaders because they care about the followers because they care about making a difference. And that's a true

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

leader. And that's a true leader.

Track 2:

That's a true leader. Those are true leaders that make a difference in the people that follow them. You look at Nelson Mandela, you look at people that really made a difference. I feel like we're lacking people that are like that. Uh, and that I noticed that because I went through a very hard time in my, when I was a, a, a, um, A profess, well, when I was a faculty or a lecturer to just that's right, yeah. Be more, more specific at the university of Miami. And, you know, I was very disappointed to see the type of leadership that they had in the, the people that were leading departments that supposed, that were supposed to be like for Batterman and leadership, the, the traits and the things that they will, the things that they will. Enable the toxic things and that they will enable people to just, um, initiate and, and there was a very toxic environment and things like that. So I just, a lot of wrong people, so I just had a feeling the more I worked and the more I see, I saw injustices, not only at work, but in society, that I thought that, you know, we're lacking true leaders and we need to develop them and we need to increase representation and we need to open the doors to minorities and women and black women to lead to. Yes, because we need those perspectives in,

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

give us a, like, give 'em a chance, like. We seen the way y'all tried it and it doesn't work like maybe getting a breath of fresh air and letting a woman, use her, her nurturing, multitasking strength to kinda, you know, lead the way, you know, that would be awesome. But speaking of leaders, like what, and I wait, I wanted to get into the Nelson Mandela. He is a great example. So many years in jail. and the words and the life he lived, like he was an, that was an incredible, incredible example. what do you think describes a good leader?

Track 2:

So that's a great question because my book is called leadership is our responsibility, right? Mm-hmm and he used to use certain features. That describes a good leader. We use, we still use those type of features. Like what makes a good leader? People say, well, they're confident and they're tall and they're outspoken and they're extroverted. But the problem is What if you're all those things Uhhuh but you are terrible to the people that you lead. Yeah. Like what if you're very confident? What if you're a tall person? What if you're somebody who's an extrovert, but behind closed doors, you're bullied to the people that you lead that I don't care about. Those features anymore. They don't, I don't care about the things that supposedly make you a leader. You know, what makes you a leader? The people that you follow, they look at you and they think you're a good. So I feel like leadership needs to change the people that follow. You need to recognize you as a leader. It shouldn't come from the person patting themselves in the back and say, I'm a great leader.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah. Like it shouldn't be the position. It should be the person that focuses on the people. Cause if the people are in sync, everyone works together better and you get more accomplished. It'll be great if that was like the standard, usually it's, I don't know. I feel like sometimes it's who asks you can kiss the most and you know, how much bullshit can you deal with, you

Track 2:

know, yeah. There is a, well, there is even a, there is a book that is called why doing incompetent men become leaders and. You see a lot of things that people have been able to get away with to come to these leadership positions. And one of them is that they mask their competence within with confidence. So they're not competent leaders, but they're very good at showing. A face or a side of them that is very confident. And the problem is that we, as a society, we get persuaded so easily by people that look a certain way or act a certain way or convincing a certain way. When we shouldn't be leadership, shouldn't be a position that is achieved based on how popular you. Yeah, or how great you are speaking. Oh, you are so eloquent. let me give you this leadership role. Oh, what if you have somebody who's not very, like, they don't speak maybe very eloquently and maybe they have an accent or maybe they, you know, maybe they're very shy. They're great leaders and the people that work under them, they're very happy. And they, and that person is able to cultivate a great work environment and the people feel like that person have changed their lives. And that makes a great leader, not the certain features and qualities that we usually see outline in the book. Yeah. That's my definition of leadership.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah, actually, that's, that's a great one. So I hope that you see that it's not. The title, man, we titles don't define us what we do defines us. And one quality, one, you know, main trait is being able to have empathy, right. And when you're a leader and you have empathy, you can relate to others and see it. If I'm not just your perspective, but someone else's. so you think the, this is a fun question. You think the world's ready for a woman? I know I'm ready for it. Yeah.

Track 2:

I do think, I think that the world is ready for a woman president. Not Hillary

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

though.

And it was very difficult to explain, uh, effectively

Track 2:

Yeah. I, I think we're all long overdue for a woman president.

The equity. More Mundo after this commercial break. Was good. Yeah. Loving the episode so far. I know Go to www.patrion.com. A forward slash the Raimundo show. Sign up is pretty easy. yeah. And I'll see you there don't just meet me there. Greet me So Snoop dog But anyway back to the show

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

So what can someone listening to right now? Like what can they do today to start like becoming a better leader or working on their leadership skills?

Track 2:

so the ver I always say that the best thing that you can do right now is start leading the people or, or start with the leadership skills at home. Mm-hmm I'm like, you have people that, you know, you are surrounded by other people, you, some people have kids, some people have, you know, their partners and things like that. Mm-hmm and you know, sometimes your partner needs some motivation. Sometimes your partner needs somebody who will listen to them. And that's what leadership is too. So how can you be a better leader for yourself and the people that are closest to you?

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

it starts with you. It

Track 2:

starts with you, it starts with you, it starts with you leading your life. Are you leading the life that you want to have? And then you can try to be leading other people? I love there is a saying that I, I, I love it says, how you do one thing is how you do everything.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

That's so true Since we in the book world, a Keystone. One half that you do that affects five. Like if you, yes. Like if you wake up early, you'll be more organized. You'll eat better. You'll make better decisions. You'll be more, you know, like you sleep better, you more like it's, when I heard that, I said that makes so much sense. Cuz I always using the example. I'm like, if I can public speak, then I can speak to one person on the podcast. Like I always mix things like that. That's crazy that, that you said that. Yeah.

Track 2:

And if you wanna start with leadership, you have to lead yourself first. Exactly.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Then you gotta be the example

Track 2:

you have to be, you have to lead by example. And, and that even that's even with like, even with the things of, um, empathy, are you empathetic with yourself? Are you compassionate with yourself when you make a mistake? Because if you're very hard on yourself, you're gonna be very hard on other people. So. You have these things that we don't realize, it's like you bring, you affect the culture of your organization and the people around you. If you're hard on other people that live with you, it is probably because you're very hard on yourself or because there's doing something that is affecting your insecure about yourself or something's going on, but you have to work on you. You have to develop that self-awareness and underst. if I wanna become a better leader, how can I lead a better life in my house first? And then I can worry about leading other people. If you cannot lead your Le yourself and lead the people around you or make a good difference, around you, then you have no business. leading people that don't even

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

know you. Cause cause the, I think the best like compliment you can get is. people wanting to work for you and you don't even have like a position to hire them. I've had, like, I think I'm a natural leader. that goes to my next question. Not that I'm a natural leader, but I had leadership potential because like every time I would go to a, a place like where I work, they will always tell me yo, what, you know, whatever you do, your work, the people that you work with do. I'm the boss, but they follow you. Like, I remember having that conversation, but you

have

Track 2:

the personal power, we call it. So you have the, like, you know, people are gravitate to you because, you know, probably have the expertise or the charisma or something that make people like, you know, follow

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

you. Yeah. Like I'm like, I'm charismatic. And like, I don't judge like I'll help anybody like anybody mm-hmm so, you being like, you're like a master. Doctor in the leadership. So for people that think that leaders are born, you know what I mean? Like

Track 2:

that is a that's. That's still always, I always say that's the question of the centric. Everybody ask, are leaders born? Are they made, are they born? Are they made I feel like it can be both. It can be a combination of both, but I feel that true leadership is a decision. It's a decision that you make to make the lives of the people that follow you. So, whether you were born a natural leader or you were made a leader, I think at the end of the day, we are basing what true leadership means based on qualities that are, that only belong to one person and not the, the effect that the person has on people. So I feel that true leadership. You have to have a good effect on other people and you have to make that decision. and yes, leaders can be made. And usually when we have a crisis and we can see with Nelson, vanela like, we were just talking about that leaders emerge during crisis. Somebody has to take the lead. Somebody has that's. and that's where true leaders. That's why I would say that's when true leaders emerge. It

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

doesn't have to be a worldwide crisis. It could be a crisis right. In your home or mm-hmm in the place where it affects us all in the mind. Yes. Um, I wanted to ask you,, in your pursuit, like to get women equal, right. equal opportunities in leadership roles. Yeah. Have you seen any improvement in that area?

Track 2:

Very, very slow. It's slow. Very, very slow. I don't. I think there are some women that have been able to get to top positions, but they've been able to get those top. Most of the women that have been able to get to top positions are white. Yeah. So Afro Latinas and, and black women have it much more difficult to get to those top positions. and it's not, I don't think we've made a lot of progress. I know some people will listen to this and say, yes, we've made progress. And I'm like, women make up more than 50% of the population in

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

the. and only like 21% are in leadership roles, right? Like around that number.

Track 2:

So 20, so wait, so we have more than 50% of the whole population are women more than 50% of all bachelors masters in doctoral degree are held by women. But then when we look at fortune 500 companies, only 8% of CEOs are women. What, how come women are part of the most educated workforce have most of the degrees, but are not represented in leadership roles. So it's like you have all these people that are prepared. And then the more you go to the top, it's like men gets to go more to the top than women. So there is even a, a fee. Um, there is a term. That a, a researcher coin that's called a glass escalator, glass escalator. So glass escalator. So in fields that are usually, predominantly, filled by women like education, you know, you have a lot of teachers that are women, a man can come in to that field and usually rise to the top most faster than women. And that's why it's called glass escalator. So in education, you'll see a lot of women are teacher. A few of them are principles and a very, very, very, very few of them are superintendent. So we still live in a system where women struggle much, much more to get to those leadership roles and men, easy men. They can come into the workforce and rise up much faster than women.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Now, you know, script. My girl tells me, I never knew that this term existed, that men. Men fail forwards. I think men fail forward. Like, so she's in HR. she always try to help women kind of like, you know, know their worth, ask for this. And like, I got to, I got to see that actually firsthand, like the way they, like, you know, they offer women less money, like, and they can have the same qualities experience and everyth. As a man. It's crazy. my mind was never on that, so I didn't know that was the thing, cuz I just feel like at this point we should be past that already. You like, we're not, that's crazy, man. Like

Track 2:

we're not, I mean, you know, it is tur. I mean, we have to make some changes. I know that we're still fighting to make those changes. We're still going out there. DNI practitioners are trying to make sure that, you know, women are represented, but we're not, we're still, making sure that women are given this fair chance to move up the.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

What, what can we do like to help that out? Like if someone listening, they, they feel, you know, motivated to, to do

Track 2:

something. So I think he's all starts at. Because, um, one of the things that women, go through in the workplace is, they go through a lot of stereotypes and implicit bias that starts at home. How does that starts at home? For example, when kids are little, you know, boy and a girl. If a boy cries, they're like, don't cry. Like a girl you're supposed to toughen up a boy. Right? that girl is usually taught that, you know, she can cry and she's, you know, she's, she's supposed to be emotional. And then, we teach the girl to care, like, you know, caring qualities. And then we teach the boy to build things to lead. Mm,

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

starts from early

Track 2:

starts very early. So what happens crazy then based on those teachings, the boys gravitate to sports and leading and kicking and being assertive and yelling and confident, and then women are more, let me be quiet across my legs. Let's make sure that I'm quiet, that I don't speak up. Yeah. And then, you know, Fast forward. Then you have people that don't negotiate salary and people that are very into negotiating their salary. Yeah. Because the confidence is there. Right? So a lot of the behaviors that we have that, you know, some people say, well, this is why they don't get paid because they don't negotiate. Well, society has socialized us to be quiet and to be reserved and to be a certain way. So it starts at home. So if you have a girl, I would be. Teacher to be confident too, and to speak up and to be assertive and to have those qualities, like we have put gender, like we have gentrified. I said, qualities that shouldn't be like being assertive is not a boy quality or girls' quality. It's just being, A's the truth. Yeah.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

That's crazy. I've never heard that gentrify qualities. that's, that's

Track 2:

the main. Yes. And there's even this thing called gender Strat. it's a lot of things that we've done in society to put genders around things. And then what happens is women are expected to be quiet and to not raise their voice and to not ask for the race. And then when they do ask for the race and they're not quiet, then they're treated badly because they're violating their gender norms. So it's, it's very bad. So it starts in socialization. And I will say for boys, if they want to cry, let them. Crying is not a girl thing or a boy thing. Yeah. And confidence is not a boy thing or a girl thing. It's just see, I cried last night.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

I said, I cried last night.

Track 2:

exactly. So it's like, you know, we cannot be shaming, boys or girls for what they do or putting genders into what they do, because then we grow up in these boxes and then it's very hard to separate yourself from those boxes when you're in corporate America. But it's society has to change in general.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

so Did something happen to you in particular that, made you want to be an advocate for women?

Track 2:

Yes. So what happened to me was that I followed the rules. I went and got my master's. I got my doctoral degree. I did high performing. I did everything. You, you like. The prescription to become successful. Right? Mm-hmm And then I still was discriminated at my job at my work at my job. I was discriminated what I felt and what a lot of black women has felt is that. For some reason, the first thing that sometimes people see when it comes to promotion and giving you opportunities is your color and your, and your. And when somebody else that sometimes they're they're males, uh, and they want to get, you know, promoted and things like that. They look at their performance, oh, you have a good performance. You're very good with people. Let me promote you. But then for women, it tends to be a, a little bit different. So when I, and I started writing my book and I started interviewing more women, especially Afro Latinas and black women, it looks like my story is very similar to a lot of women out. So, yeah. I will release the book in January and I will talk about their stories. And I've interviewed people from different companies. IBM Mera, Amazon, like higher education, black women. and they felt the same. They felt like they've been stopped in their career, that it had nothing to do with their performance that it had to do with how they look. And they never had anybody. Let's say those companies never had somebody and I'm not talking about a particular company here. So you're Amazon or any, this company's listening to me. It's not about you. but some of these companies, what happened was. Their, their representation wasn't there. And because their representation wasn't there, they felt like they were stopped. So they had more to prove in order for them to get equal footing than a guy. So. I feel like, you know, I've been interviewing a lot of people. It happen to me too, and still there in society. So that makes me a huge advocate. And in the Dominican Republican, the Latino community, a lot of people that represent our community out there, they're usually like Latinos, not black Latinos.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah. I noticed that too. Like, what's up, but we got like, we got a face too, like we can exactly.

Track 2:

So, you know, watch the movie, you watch the movie in the Heights. They're supposed to be representative of the Dominican community, which like the majority looks like can for Latinos, they had as a lead, a white Latino, who was like from Puerto Rico and I'm like, well, we're here. Like we exist. So I see any movies see in the workplace. And I think that we need to increase our representation.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Yeah. I think we, uh, it would be great, man. Cuz then since it starts from when we were younger, those kids can see that yo, you know what damn, it doesn't matter what, what my gender or my, my, my races, we all people at the end of the day. That's why I never, I that's why I don't get like, like regardless the height, shade, whatever, whatever you are, you're a human you, your blood is red. You have skin, you have features. I will never get how we even got here, but that's, that's a whole nother, that's a whole, oh, that's another

Track 2:

story. Like then we have to talk about slavery and everything else. So yeah. Yeah, it

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

goes okay. So, um, Are you still a coach at Ted talk? I mean, at TEDx, well,

Track 2:

I was a speaker at, I was a TEDx speaker, so I don't coach for TEDx. Oh. But I did at TEDx.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

how would you sum up that experience in, in one, in a few words.

Track 2:

So it was a very interesting experience. You know, you have to go through a lot of, um, you have to go through audition, you have to go and. Make sure that you have a speech that is compelling, that is associated with a theme, and then you have to practice a lot. And I felt like I practiced so much. And at the end I was still nervous because, you know, you're there doing a TEDx speech. So that in my mind, I was like, oh my God, I'm doing this thing that is so big. But you know, it's a lot of experience. And at the end of the day, you know, you can be nervous the last day. So you cannot expect that, you know, you just like the nervousness is going to go out. You just have to decide to do it.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

How could you get qualified? Is there like a requirement?

Track 2:

So you apply? I don't the one that I was doing right now for that is, is particular that was in an institution, but it depends, you have to go online and you have to. Look at, if you go to ted.com mm-hmm, you'll be able to see different locations where Ted TEDx conferences are held and then each location will have like their own requirements for you to apply and be selected.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

My dream is to give a Ted talk, how I went from the streets of Brooklyn to a depressed anxiety field, you know, not showing himself boy to a father grown man. Worldwide podcaster author, voice actor, actor. I just, I wanna do a lot. I was gonna say you're gonna have said that

Track 2:

ons. So go to Ted and look for one conference or one, uh, TEDx that is around your area and just apply. You just have to apply. Don't don't don't just lay back, like, just go and do it.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

All right. So what role does fear play in your.

Track 2:

Oh, fear is with me at all times. I I'm a scary cat. Sometimes

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

look at that and you still, and you give speeches, you teach people, you

Track 2:

train because fear is with me, but that fear doesn't determine what I'm going to do or not going to do. Yes. It's like, he's there with me. Like I'm, I'm somebody who gets scared. I get I'm a person who's like, I grew up being scared about everything and the fear hasn't gone away, but I just like, I just have to you, like, what am I gonna do? Stop living. I'm just gonna take my fear with me putting in my backpack and keep going.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

okay. How, what do you do to take care of your mental

Track 2:

health? What do I do? Take care of my mental health. I practice a lot of me. meditation is great. And, when you're in the coaching industry, you learn so many techniques to like reframing your thoughts. I do a lot of self-awareness a lot. I do a lot of digging. Like whenever I feel bad, I'm like, where is this coming from? Is this a pattern in this, a limiting belief? Where did I get this? Let me just go right now and, and, and challenge that belief system. That's not my belief system. That was like an aunt that lost her business. And I don't have to like, live with that. So I do a lot of like work, internally.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

See, and unless you see that, the questions that you looking for, you have the answers, you just have to to give yourself time to think. Yeah. So with everything you, with everything you're doing. Continuously improving. What does the future hold for Dr. Mari?

Track 2:

I don't know, but I'm excited to find out.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

and what do you hope to accomplish? Like when it's all said and done what

Track 2:

you, so, one of the things that I want to accomplish, I want to do things related to the empowerment of women AF after Latinas too. And also I would love to do something for kids. I've always been passionate about kids, especially kids that are. that don't have any family they're in foster care kids that are neglected kids that are, they don't have, you know, anybody to look after them. After I went through homelessness, I was like, you know, how many kids out there are struggling? I know

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

man. So sad,

Track 2:

like, so I wish that I can do that. Whatever I accomplish in the future gives me the opportunity to change the lives of many.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Hold up. that's awesome. Um, yeah, the kids are the future. Like it starts with them. If we, if we start with them and we are serious about it, things are changed in the present. And in the future, you have this book when, when could listeners expect this?

Track 2:

So my book is going to come out on January 20, 23, but the pre-sale is going to start I believe in August. So if you wanna peek into the book and then you want to also participate of my pre-launching campaign and speeches and things like that, it will happen in August, August.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

All right. Cool, cool. Summertime. Yes. Gonna be hot this summer. I said, yeah, for sure. Now LA last question where. My listeners that I'm pretty sure love the things you said and want to hear more, where could they go

Track 2:

so they can go to LinkedIn and then they'll find me at Mari. So cap. So Dr. Mari, so cap. Yeah. Don't forget that one. And I'm, yes, don't forget that one. Um, and you'll see that as I'm the one who, as an employer has the cafe Institute, which is an Institute for. Certificates. So if you want to get your coaching certificates, I'm going to have my first cohort in August. So very excited about that. Congratulations. And then. I also in Instagram at pro cap, P R O F cap, and yes, you can find me on those two things. Either LinkedIn or Instagram, Instagram, I post in Spanish. And then in LinkedIn, I post in English and Spanish. Uh, but I'm, you know, I'm out there. I have a woman in leadership newsletter where I post about women and in leadership position in LinkedIn. So you're more than welcome to follow me there. And I have an, a podcast in Spanish

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

LA.

Track 2:

CEO LA CEO. And I bring woman with in, with very inspirational stories to talk about how they found their leaders within.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

Oh man. They, I don't know what I saw a video where you had the background. It was the colors. I don't know the colors was just so it was great. I don't know. I was watching some clips and I was like, damn, that's a nice background. I'm thank you. Take those colors for myself. I wanna thank you for being on the Raymundo show. It was, it was great to have you, I would like to have you back again, where we can have a full hour. Yes. You know, into that free. Um, but you know, I wanna thank you. And, and I appreciate you. The things you're doing, you know, for your family and for women, minorities, anybody who, Been programmed to think that they don't have a voice, you know, you're letting them know, like it doesn't have to be that way. And if I gotta be the one to talk first and lead the way, then why not? And we need more of us to do that. Cuz the more we do that, the more we can make that change that we really need to live in a better society. And Dr. Mari saw, went from, being homeless to, she just told you about her, her, I. So your mind limits you, but your belief in your actions can make all the difference. I said all of that, just to say it was great to have you and, and I wish you at the remain show, we wish you all the best of luck and everything you do get that book leadership is the responsibility and what great. What is no, it's what they say, what great power CRA becomes with great responsibility, but what great responsibility comes. Great power

Track 2:

Yes. Thank you so much for having me here. It was a pleasure. No problem.

raymundo-follow-the-leader:

No problem. Thank you. Take care. Mm-hmm

Before you leave, you must be led. I'm not, you heard that shit before. Before you try to feed anyone You must be fed. But first you must learn how to govern yourself. Because there are times in life where helpers and available. And you have to save yourself. like Bruce Willis did in Looper. You don't need access to a gun to be a straight shooter. Especially, if you want people to follow you like a pie. You see, I. Notice empathy is ingrained in a true leader who's energy tells you the whole story before word has even spoken. Whose position is defined by actions, matching words and understanding that winning the MVP doesn't guarantee a championship. Putting it teammates and situations to Excel, like a point guard where your strengths can make it easier to score. Now that's what the fuck I'm talking about. Some Jason Kisha here. You ain't got to be a manager. You just have to manage taking the leading your life. Cause if you don't, you just fall for anything. For yourself, you've got to take a stand. Have your own national Anthem, all hosts say, can you see. That deleted, you could be starts at home. And from there, you can take it anywhere, even from your underwear. Yo, but this was a great episode. It made me want to take a stand. Lead the way. You also say be the sensei become the sensei. I want to thank doctor. Marysol. For coming on the show and giving us that wisdom, that energy, you know, and she's, so my. You know, my home country. We can go. Yeah, man, buck. With a visual first time listening. Or you a regular Moonglow listener. I want to thank you for tuning in. You know The episodes are coming every week, man. little by little, everything is coming together. I'm just trying to get out of my own way. But so next time be safe. Peace, love Mundo out.